Day 112 – Summer slumming
The time of year has arrived when pale chested males become utterly convinced it is their God given right to walk about the streets exposing their ultimately redundant nipples to all in their path. I have never quite understood why they believe it is appropriate to walk behave as though they have the abdominals of Achilles himself, but they do, and I for one find it disturbing.
I came out on my lunch break today determined to soak up the sun and spend the full hour basking in the beauty of the memorial gardens, but I was thwarted by the bare chests wherever I looked. I like to think I am a liberal but when it comes to front rumps, excessive cleavage and the bare chested males I find myself tipping towards the blue.
Perhaps they are trying to pick up a tan and are unaware of the wonder of the Saint Tropez tanning range. The other theory of course is they believe it is a way of attracting the ladies, but never in all my years have I felt myself swoon at the sight of their bare skin and never before have I noticed any other woman doing so. On sunny beaches topless males running around playing volleyball and splashing and surfing in the sea are quite welcome scenery, but in the town centre sipping a can of larger? Horrid.
One thing we all have to be grateful for however is this increased amount of sunshine must surely signal the beginning of the end of the Ugg season. Surely even hardened Ugg wearers will find the heat renders their sweaty slipper an unbearable choice? We must all remain vigilant however as it is precisely this in between season during which trends like Crocs have been born. These plastic monstrosities are already starting to spatter our streets with their brightly coloured plastics.
We must take a stand. If a friend has chosen them, remember it is your duty, as it was with Uggs, to tell them kindly but firmly that they look ridiculous. They will protest, I assure you, they will after all be armed with information about how fun they are and how they are much more conventional than comfortable shoes. You must remain resolute and remind them they are not a child and that in the history of clothing there has never been anything with which these monsters will match. If they continue to protest insist on walking at least two feet ahead of them at all times telling them you have no choice because of the dreadful smell the holes in their footwear is emitting into the environment.
- Today’s dress is on loan from my good friend Kat Ingham. It is from Pradamark and though dark still felt rather summery. The accessories chosen are floral mesh tights, my heart necklace which provided endless entertainment to my best friends babies and of course the lovely sweet Isabella who has joined me for previous shoots. She is a lot stronger these days and is a very wriggly giggly baby. She seemed quite determined to launch herself from my knee and learn to fly forthwith. In spite of the fact that one of the two tots somehow managed to get a grab on my necklace and nick it out of my grasp I am a little bit in love with them both, even though they have stolen my hearts.
