Lost in notation blog

Day 240 – The killer shoes

September 14, 2010 at 10:40 pm (Uncategorized)

Safe in the knowledge that today is Monday and would therefore be a day of minimal movement I chose a pair of heels best characterised by both their beauty and gravity defying balance.  They were camel coloured and in keeping with my safari look so I was really rather pleased.

Half way out the house I noticed that perhaps, due to not quite securing my necessary six to seven hours of sleep I was a little unbalanced.  I did consider changing the shoes but as I was, for once, running on time as I had to return the video camera to the office before the boss noticed it was not in its proper place, I set to a stride and told my tootsies to be silent.  After all we have been in worse footwear dilemmas than this before.

At the end of my street it became apparent that I had underestimated my enemy.  Without tights and with no bannister or the balance of the boy I was tottering like a stripper on ice after one too many Smirnoff nerve steadying sips.

Halfway to work things got worse as I felt a feeling not known of for many years, the soles of my feet.  They were in agony and a blister had begun on my heel and was cutting in at every step.  I soldiered on, resisting the urge to hijack or hussle a lift arriving at the office out of breath and beaten.

Hoping I could retire to my desk for a morning of calls, emails and general set ups the matter soon hitteth the fan when a lovely man came to test my tootsies with a story about a tree.  It was not long before I was sent away to photograph said tree before it was pulled down for a car park by Harborough District Council.  It was a truly lovely tree but then again so were once my feet prior to walking to see it.  To add injury to insult by the time I got there the tree had been chopped down and no matter what journalistic skills I tried to muster I could not get the workmen to hold it up while I got a scene shot.

Three hours, 30,000 steps, two blisters and one severe cut later I arrived back at my home.  The shoes were stripped off and replaced with a sensible five-inch backless wedge and the now bloodied shoes were left in the boot of the car where they will stay.  I feel quite hurt by them and my feet which I have finally felt after fourteen years.

• Today’s dress was from Prada mark, a gift from the Polish Princess as was the belt which I by accidentally chopped in half this morning while trying to add an extra hole.  the point missed my tummy by millimetres so I should have predicted today was not going to be a friendly day for fashion.