Lost in notation blog

The Story by the Sun: A diary of a bipolar breakdown

November 28, 2011 at 6:37 am (Uncategorized)

For those of you who have not seen the article I thought I’d run the details on here.  There is more on the Sun’s website and further pics were used on the page itself but hopefully this will be enough to give you a bit of a flavor.

Enjoy and please feedback about the content, how it has been written or if there is anything which stood out to you.  I am currently absurdly thick skinned so feel free to pull no punches if ther is something you need to get off your chest and if you would like the comment just be to me let me know and I will not check it and make it public after accessing it.

Diary of a Bipolar Breakdown

Ellie O’Neill told of how she suffered on Twitter page

By Lynsey Haywood

Published 10 Nove 2011

WHEN Ellie O’Neill was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, she started tweeting to raise awareness of mental illness.

She planned to wear a different dress every day for a year and to post pictures of herself online in all the outfits.

It was a similar project to that of fashionata Poppy Disney, 24, who became an internet hit earlier this year with her fashion blog.

But halfway through what was meant to be a fun and lighthearted project all that changed – when Ellie’s own bipolar manifested itself with dramatic symptoms.

She became physically ill – fainting, sweating, losing blood – then mentally, she began to crumble.

Her Twitter page became a diary of her breakdown and her blog gave a heart-wrenching insight into the life of someone with bipolar.

She continued to tell her story from A&E and her hospital bed – to an audience of strangers on Twitter.

Ellie, 27, from Market Harborough, Leics said: “I didn’t really know much about bipolar when I was diagnosed after recurring bouts of depression in my twenties.

“At first I was told I had bipolar 2 – a milder form. Then things took a turn for the worse and I was told I had bipolar 1. It’s a very individual illness. People see stars like Kerry Katona falling apart and that’s what they think it is. But it’s different for everyone who is diagnosed.

“I’m back on track now. I’m working again and I’m feeling really well.”

Ellie, a local newspaper journalist, suffered her first bout of depression when she was 19 at Manchester University.

She quit and returned to her home in Market Harborough but returned to the university the following year.

It wasn’t until October 2009 that she was diagnosed. She had to take two types of medication – an anti-depressant and a mood-leveller.

This had been enough to keep her on an even keel but in September last year, after splitting with her boyfriend and having a few petty rows with her family, Ellie’s condition spiralled out of control.

The old feelings returned and she went to Kettering General Hospital. She was sent away but when she returned home she fainted.

An ambulance was called and she was returned to A&E.

Ellie found solace in her mobile phone, updating her account on Twitter and sending desperate messages to friends.

She even tweeted Sarah Brown because the wife of former Prime Minister Gordon was one of Ellie’s followers and had been keeping in touch with the mental health charity MIND. Sarah replied to say she was following her ordeal.

From A&E Ellie was placed on a ward where all she can remember is desperately wanting to escape.

She spent long hours in the hospital chapel, hiding from doctors, hiding from nurses, and trying to hide from life itself.

Doctors eventually found her medical notes and realised she had a history of mental illness and Ellie was taken by ambulance to the specialist Brandon Unit at Leicester General Hospital. She had been there before but only as an outpatient.

She said: “I genuinely thought I was in some kind of dream, but a dream from which I couldn’t wake up. I didn’t think I was a threat to myself or anyone else.”

But the doctors thought differently and Ellie was sectioned.

Describing the ward, Ellie likened the patients to those on any hospital ward, adding, “Their difference is that they are mentally ill, rather than physically ill. It is no big deal.

“It is partly why I wanted to do this article, to show that people with mental health problems are also normal people.

“I think people assume patients in there are going to be dangerous. They’re not. Yet we don’t speak about it we don’t discuss it as a society. We just brush it under the carpet.

“We’ve rid ourselves of so much stigma – about race, gender, class – which is good. But there is still so much stigma about mental health.” Ellie attempted suicide at her lowest – and urges anyone with similar feelings to seek help.

In her blog she admitted feeling suicidal, calling it the “S” word. “This morning I woke up with one thing on my mind,” she wrote. “Ending it all.”

Ellie had to get in touch with her psychiatrist, her lawyer and GP and there was a tribunal to see if it was safe for her to be released. She was discharged. The section overturned.The relationship with her boyfriend has now been repaired and Ellie is back at work.

She said: “I wanted to do this to let people see beyond the stereotype, to show that people can have mental health issues and still play a valid role in society.

“We can hold down jobs. We can have relationships. We can do everything ‘normal’ people can do.We are not defined by our illness, just as, in the same way, someone with a physical illness is not defined by theirs.”

For the full article, pictures and selected tweets from the time of the breakdown and beyond it go to thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/woman/health/health/3925423/Diary-of-a-bipolar-breakdown.html or alternatively Google Ellie O’Neill and find the link to the full article by the Sun on the first page of the search.